Stepmother

I was created to be a stepmom.

Quickly after Chris and I were married, I realized this fact. I forgot it for while. Recent times have been tough – my fuse exceptionally short, Brytin willingly admitting he “doesn’t WANT to listen,” and the pressure I put on myself to be an awesome stay-at-home stepmom. But alas, my purpose in this world is quite apparent.

I was reading a friend’s blog, and she was talking about what a pain it is to be awaken by her 9-mo-old so early before her body is ready to get out of bed; and she jolted me back to reality when she then pointed out what a blessing it is to have a child to wake up to. She wrote, “Seeing you is worth getting out of bed for…every single morning.” Ps 127:3 “Children are a gift of the Lord.”

Feb 16, 2008
I gained some interesting clarity today…Apparently, God has a very special purpose for me in this world. I am a stepmother. In the grand scheme of things, I am to Brytin what Lynn was to Jess. I am to Brytin what Brian was to me. I feel like God has gifted me the opportunity to right all the wrongs in my dysfunctional family by fulfilling my role as stepmom to Brytin. With grace, prayer, discernment, patience and love, Brytin WILL have a great childhood.

I NEVER thought I’d be a stepmom. I broke up with an ex-boyfriend for that very reason. I even told my sister one time that I can’t believe she is was willing to put herself in that position. After all we had been through at the hands of our steps (and probably put them through), how could she even consider it an option?And then I met Brytin. I forgot all about my trepidation into step-parenthood. It obviously helps that I am head over heels crazy about his dad ;) But seriously, Brytin is so amazing; I don’t think I could be anyone else’s stepmom. He is so smart and so cute and so respectful and so interested in learning. He makes every day a fun adventure.

In my head, “step” has such a negative, disgusting connotation. I wish there was another title. Well, actually, there is…Brytin thinks “Leslie” is my title. HaHa He refers to me as “his Leslie” just like he would “his daddy or mommy.” It’s pretty cute. I hope that my actions towards Brytin and his mother will be a “step” towards improving the world’s view of stepmothers.

Motherhood

Current mood: blessed

I am so thankful to God for the opportunity to be Brytin's stepmom. It has been such an amazing blessing.He spent the whole past Sunday with his mom - he was away from me for about 10 or 11 hours. At about the 8th hour, I started to really really really miss him...and the moment he got home I gave him the biggest hug and kiss I've probably ever given him! He really is an amazing little boy.

Learning to Read

Words Brytin can now write and recognize in his world:

Brytin

Go

No

So

On

Egg

Cat Dog

A Garden Adventure!

The Quail Botanical Gardens was WAY cooler than I expected. Brytin and I spent about an hour walking around some of the gardens. We pretended we were Diego, in the jungle, with maps and magnifying glasses. Whenever we would come to a fork in the road, I would let him chose which direction to go. We ended up walking in circles a lot, but it was fun. Thankfully, Brytin is a good sport about humoring my interest in all things botanical :)





Quail just opened a new garden - the Hamiliton Children's Garden - a couple weeks ago. Unfortunately, the tree house was closed for repairs (?!!). We spent about thirty minutes playing in the Children's Garden with wood blocks, musical instruments, etc.





They also had another children's area that Brytin LOVED. (Seeds of Wonder.) We played with dinosaurs, a water well, and they had a huge train.



We finished off the afternoon with a walk through one of their cactus gardens. Good day!

Location: Encinitas, CA

Home

Current mood: accomplished

Yesterday was my first truly successful, rewarding, awesome day as a stay-at-home stepmom. I got so much done! And I had a GREAT time with Brytin. When Chris got home, he said, “You guys make my crappy day melt away.” (Or something similarly sweet, I can’t remember it verbatim – whatever it was, I felt truly accomplished.)There are so many reasons that my lay-off at AMN is for the betterment of my family. I am truly VERY thankful that God worked that into His amazing plan.

It starts

April 15, 2009 the company I was working for told me that I would only have a job with them for 30 more days. Initially, I was devastated. I thought that my work ethic kept me safe from the frightening circumstance that had befallen so many. I worried about my family – where would we get money for food? And I was irritated that I would have to search for a job again, because I HATE job hunting. I work hard, I learn fast, and I am excessively diligent, efficient and dedicated. My resume does not reflect my character assets that came as a great surprise to all who have hired me. Because my resume is what it is, I often apply for job and get no response. It’s inconsiderate and disrespectful and degrading. Seriously, I DESPISE job hunting.

Those were my initial thoughts. Then I called my husband to deliver the unfortunate news. Almost immediately, he suggested I stay home with Brytin his last summer before starting school. At first, I was shocked – could I be a stay-at-home-stepmom after working for 15 years? It is nerve-racking to finally get what you always thought you wanted. What if I suck at it? What if I hate it? I think the biggest hindrance to achieving our dreams is the nagging suspicion that it just might not be all it is cracked up to be. When our dreams are not acted upon, they are safe. They are always in there in the back of our minds as a place to retreat, escape, fantasize, but once we take one teeny tiny step towards being or doing what we have always wanted, there is the possibility that our dream was stupid (or at least not a good fit for our personality).

Over the next 30 days, the idea grew on me. My husband was hugely supportive and encouraging, Brytin was excited for all the new adventures I pitched to him and no one seemed to think it was a horrible idea. So, I created some goals:
1. Cook everyday
2. Clean everyday
3. Teach Brytin how to read
4. Seriously consider writing a book

So…here I am. A stay-at-home stepmom. My first week off of work, Brytin was still in daycare, so I cooked and cleaned and bummed around stores. It was pretty fun.

I am not sure what the future holds, but I am thankful for this opportunity to explore my dream of being a stay-at-home parent.

I once read a book called "The Magic of Thinking Big." I wish I had kept the book so I could read it right now. The basic premise is that success is not limited by your education or intellect or finanical backing. Success is a direct result of how big you can think. I think that I can be the greatest, most amazing, and most fun stay-at-home parent :)